2018 in review

We celebrated little things. We read books. We went on adventures. In March, that meant on an airplane. We ate junk. Exhausted, we slept. We played. And partied. I traveled to Tampa and LA and Washington and Oregon and Colorado and Cancun. I walked or ran in all of those places, sometimes stopping to take pictures.... Continue Reading →

servers are not servants

I waitress on the weekends, like I've done before, many moons ago and then again not so many moons ago. I keep coming back to serving because it is fast cash and I am good at this job of taking orders and refilling drinks and running food and making small talk for an hour with... Continue Reading →

a symbol others recognize

Although I've been done with school since July, the formal commencement for my class wasn't until December. Most people in our program elect not to walk. But not me, Jen, and Suzanne. We signed the fuck up. Ordered our caps and gowns. Showed up at an ungodly hour, prepared to sit for hours, which we... Continue Reading →

this I can do

It's a lot, Christmas. Maybe it didn't help that I moved the weekend after Thanksgiving but even so, on Black Friday I went to Lowe's and bought a Christmas tree and then I got an elf on the shelf from Target and even I remember to move it. Last night we made Christmas cookies and... Continue Reading →

nesting anew

I've been thinking lately about the spaces we occupy, about how we dwell. I've been thinking of how we shrink and expand to our containment, how we adapt to our surroundings. I've been wondering over how our homes, like branding irons, burn marks into our skin. On Friday, I sat on the floor of my... Continue Reading →

change like hail

Yesterday I went in to sign my new lease. There was the woman who approved me for the apartment and we laughed (cackled, really) as she talked me through the thousand pages. The other employee came in and tactfully told her to get back to work. Still, the woman told me about her mom who... Continue Reading →

a place of my own

For the last couple months, I have been looking for a place to live. This past year I lived in an apartment of divorce: it was in the air, lingering in the fibers of my couch, my carpet. The rent was was divorce-settlement high and always, I knew it was not a sustainable option. It... Continue Reading →

names like colors

"Mom, there are other people with my name," Brandon told me yesterday. "In books or on shows, I see other Brandons." So I told him names, like colors, get used again and and again. I told him a name is a word we assign to someone as if it is his own, although it isn't... Continue Reading →

the cold side of independence

It's been a year, almost, on my own like this. I wasn't prepared for how hard it would be. I remembered fondly living alone, after college, before marriage. And naively, maybe that's how I thought it would be again. That was when I held two jobs to cover rent and expenses. That was when I... Continue Reading →

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