19 tips for dating a writer

  1. don’t read her journals. trust me. 
  2. if she offers you some of her work to read, remember kindness. 
  3. and don’t assume the asshole character is you (although it very well could be). 
  4. she might forget to eat. make her food. 
  5. when she stays up late writing, kiss her head on your way upstairs, don’t shame her about skipping sex. she is making art, god damn it. 
  6. she is making art, god damn it, respect that. 
  7. even though it doesn’t come with a paycheck. 
  8. rub her down with oils or lotions. trust me. 
  9. when people ask you what she does, say, “she’s a writer” in a brag, not a whisper. 
  10. don’t needle her on good days, enjoy them. 
  11. don’t needle her on bad days. They’re bad enough already.
  12. just needle her on Tuesdays, when nothing happens anyway. 
  13. read to her. 
  14. expect that she’ll be late.
  15. she’s gonna either be decked out to the nines or looking slubby in sweats. deal either way.
  16. if she fishes for a compliment, give her five.
  17. and no matter what she’s acting like, don’t you dare tell her she’s crazy. 
  18. you try living in the heads of a hundred different characters. 
  19. yeah. it’s like that.

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