Words I needed to write words

People seem to feel strongly for or against making resolutions. I feel neither. I make resolutions usually, but not because I need to to motivate myself. I do like the symbolism of turning over a new leaf – a fresh start with a fresh calendar.

Last year I killed it in the working out department. I was motivated by my large clothes and lumpy body. Then, I got to a point where the weather got cold and I reached my goal range. I still work out, but I wasn’t changing it up, I was just going through the motions. Then I read Britney Spears’  workout regimen in Women’s Health and I thought, I can do that. I’m a pretty fit person. She does this interval treadmill running like I do. But Britney don’t play. I couldn’t do it. Well, I did 15 of the 60 minutes and then eased up to a slow jog on nearly no incline. So this year, I’m going to change it up on my workouts. I will get stronger and faster.

But my real goal this year is to focus on my passion. And my passion is and always has been writing. I claim that, but I don’t just do it. This year, I’m just going to do it. I will make myself short-term goals like I did with working out. I’m sure I can make an Excel spreadsheet out of page count goals, and a reason for a spreadsheet should be reason alone for me to stick with my plan. I’m going to write the book I’ve always had inside me. I’m going to release the beast.

In the past month, multiple people have sent me encouragement to write. Friends, past co-workers and mere acquaintances have reached out to tell me this. It brings tears to my eyes, because these people have no ulterior motive, but even still they are encouraging me to reach out for my dreams. I needed each note and email and blog comment. I needed to believe someone would read it to be inspired to write it. An “If you build it, they will come” of sorts.

I know you will write good things – however long it takes, however different from what you intended – you will write good things – beautiful things. 

Just wanted you to know that once a month at least I read your blog and love it. Love seeing the pictures of your little cuties and you should really write a book. But isn’t that what you are really doing? You are very good at it. 

I love reading your blog. I only stumble across it every six months or so, but you are such a delightful writer. I find myself laughing, agreeing, shedding a tear, and so much more. 

Has your “stay at home” time allowed you any time to write?  Are you closer to finishing your novel?  The material that you sent me hooked me and I hope you’ve continued with it.  You have a great talent and I think you are on to something there.  

Thanks to you guys and to the two of you who sent me the text messages I accidentally deleted. I don’t know how you all knew that I needed those words, or how they all came at the same time, but I am grateful. And now, it’s time to get to work. No more fucking around. Dreams don’t come true without a bit of hard work, and I’m ready to put in my time.

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