TOP hates

Some people say I hate everything, but I only hate some things. To prove this, I've created a list of my TOP hates (if it isn't listed, I could probably get over it): Chinese food, split-levels, lipstick residue, red bumps after shaving, "anywho," those quizzes on Facebook, being trapped into a work project at 4:58,... Continue Reading →

top ten reasons I wanted a house

10. No more of these meth-head neighbors pestering me every time I come and go. Just because you hate the maintenance man doesn't mean I do, too. And I certainly hope your looks aren't contagious. 9. My yard will not be littered with feces, pet hair, and Milwaukee's Best cans. Just feces (from Tucker, just... Continue Reading →

Trashy checklist

Lots of trashy people around here (we're minutes from Iowa) that don't have a clue that they're trashy. Here is a check list: if even one of these apply to you, you're trashtastic:1. You have any apparel boasting beer or liquor logos2. You drive a car made in the 70s by choice3. Saturday night: 40s... Continue Reading →

typical day at the oakview mall

I am not Anna Wintour by any stretch of the imagination, but there are a few fashion faux pas that irk the hell out of me. These are as follows:1. Denim on denim2. Velvet (no exceptions: it is NEVER ok-- in fact, my uncle single-handedly ruined all of my mother's wedding pictures by wearing a... Continue Reading →

friend required traits list

There is a reason I don’t have many (minus the “m”) friends. It is because of the following list:Traits I look for in a friend (must have all to be considered):1. In conversation, both speaks and listens, and a fair amount of each. 2. Will at least act (but prefer to actually be) excited when... Continue Reading →

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